Raymond Robert Murphy

Raymond Robert Murphy was born July 28, 1924 in Dayton, Ohio to parents Thomas R and Margaret (Madigan) Murphy.

Whether you knew him as Ray Murphy, Dad, Grandpa, Uncle Ray, Cousin Ray (a name he coined for himself after all the other Aunts and Uncles had passed on and he was, using his words, “On deck”), Corporal Murphy, or Bingo Poor Ray, be assured that he loved and cherished each and every one of you. We are here today, not to mourn Dad, but to celebrate his life and times with us. Dad liked a good joke and a good top 10 list, so we have the top 10 reasons to celebrate Dad’s journey with us.

10. Dad was a Marine all his life. He was a Marine during World War II, assigned to the Pacific theatre, specifically based in China. If you value Freedom, Liberty and social justice…the strong protecting the weak…then celebrate his life and his contribution to the preservation of Freedom and Liberty throughout the world. Marines fight for those who cannot.

9. Dad was an avid-accomplished golfer. He won his flight in a few tournaments in Beaumont. He enjoyed the Murphy Open, competing with his family for bragging rights and a small trophy. He taught me his love of the game and respect of its many rules. If you love golf, then celebrate his life.

8. Dad was a builder of Community. At St. Anne’s in Beaumont, he participated in many Men’s Club and Knight of Columbus activities, bringing the St. Anne’s Catholic Community together, raising money for the school and Church and making lasting friends along the way. He thought working together was a good way to make friends and build community. Later in life at Preston Place, he loved a good theme party. Whether it was Mardi Gras (dancing with a purple and green umbrella in one hand while grasping the famous “Red Ryder” walker in the other), 4th of July, Photos with Marilyn Monroe or the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders, he was always there trying to make the party fun for all. If you value friends and community, then celebrate Dad’s life.

7. Speaking of fun, for Dad’s 89th Birthday celebration, we hired a Karaoke Cab, complete with blaring music, party lights and dry ice fogging the interior of the cab. We surprised him at his apartment with it. I told him I would pick him up at his apartment. As we walked from his apartment to the parking lot, he wondered why the cab was there and where my car was parked. I told him that we should ask the cab driver for a ride. As we walked past the cab (much to his shock), I opened the cab door, fog from the dry ice machine billowed out of the large sliding door. As the fog cleared to reveal the colorful lights and 10 of his family and friends, screaming his name along with a hearty happy birthday, Dad was genuinely touched that his family and extended family would be there for him on his 89th. For the next few hours, we took turns cruising the streets of Plano with him, singing at the top of our lungs to the songs playing in the Karaoke Cab. Several songs stick out for me that day, including Great Balls of Fire, Chantilly Lace, (both Jerry Lee Lewis), Elvira and Detour. If you value family, friends and a good birthday party, then celebrate Dad’s life.

6. Dad was an optimist in most respects. He always thought that he might live forever (even though we would remind him that the grim reaper was undefeated), things will work out and no use worrying until there was something to worry about. One exception was money…the glass was always ½ empty when it came to coffers. If you value optimism, celebrate Dad’s life.

5. Speaking of money, Dad was generally recognized as…er...uh…frugal. He was a child during the Great Depression and like many of that age group, he knew and taught us the value of a Dollar and conserving for the future. Someone (I think it was Norm) asked whether he still had the first Dollar he ever made. While I cannot confirm the answer to that question, I can attest that we found a 1932 penny among his possessions in a place of honor and reverence. Perhaps, he still had the first penny he ever earned. He would have been 8 years old in 1932 and it might make sense. If you value planning, conservatism and fiscal responsibility, then celebrate Dad’s life.

4. Dad love music and food. He had many CDs (Irish Tenors, Gospel Music, Country and VERY old oldies) which he would play on his DVD player instead of watching television. For Birthdays and Christmas, he would ask for CDs to be burned for him of his favorite-hard-to-find songs. His loving Granddaughter, Kate would always oblige…she was not only his music supplier, but also his scrabble partner and game player on their iPads. He loved her dearly and she him as well. He said that food for him growing up was extremely bland (not sure whether that is an Irish trait or not) and the Marine Corp food did not enhance his food experience. He married Mom who was an accomplished southern and Creole cook, changing his food world forever. He was extremely particular about food later in life and we always had to get him exactly what he wanted after he stopped driving. His last meal was #9 (beef enchilada dinner) from Mi Cocina. Normally, he would eat ½ and save ½ for the next day, but that day he ate the entire dinner. We told the doctors and nurses that it was the low salt, no fat #9 from MiCocina to get it passed them. If you like good food and music, then celebrate Dad’s life.

3. Family came first for Dad. He loved you all. There is a line from a Billy Joel song, “He was quick with a joke and a light of your smoke, but there was some place he would rather be.” To describe Dad, we would have to rephrase to “…he was quick with a joke and a light of your smoke, but where family was concerned there was no place he would rather be.” He was always remembering and repeating jokes to anyone who would listen. He always wanted to brighten their day and make them laugh. He would remember everyone’s name when he met them and practice their name many times so that he could call them by name at that time and next time he met them again. He was very impressive and hardworking when it came to remembering and calling people by name. When he was going somewhere, he would anticipate the people he would meet there and practice their names. He wrote thank you notes for every gift he was given and would mail them through the USPS. What you might not know is that we found many spiral notebooks containing “practice notes” where he would refine and hone that which he wanted to say to get it just right for the recipient. The effort he put into the thank you notes was extraordinary. He loved family and family gatherings. In later years when he could not make the gathering, he would send a note wishing everyone well and expressing his disappointment for being unable to attend. If you value family and friends, celebrate Dad’s life.

2. Semper Fi. Dad was always faithful and loyal. Whether it was to the precepts of the Marine Corp, to family or to loved ones, Dad was always faithful. When Mom came down with dementia for the last 8 years of her life, Dad was always there for her, caring for her even though she could not remember his name or his importance in her life. When he could not care for her the last few months of her life and needed assistance, he visited her every day until she passed. If you value faithfulness and loyalty, then celebrate Dad’s life.

1. Dad shows us a glimpse of the Father. The day before Dad passed, we gathered around him, spending the day with him as he passed in and out of consciousness. When he was awake, he was as sharp and keen witted as he ever was. His mind did not dim or dull with his 94 plus years. He was very lucid. At around 9:00am, he asked me, “Where are we going”? I told him, “We are going to Heaven”. He got a quizzical look on his face, said “Oh” and fell back asleep. Approximately 2 hours later, he asked again, “Where are we going”? Again, I told him, “We are going to Heaven, Dad.” He said, “Oh, yeah” remembering what I had told him earlier. A third time about an hour later, he awoke and asked again, “Where are we going?” Again, I told him, “We are going to Heaven, Dad”. Dad said quickly back to me, “No, no. I talked to God who said that that was tomorrow morning…early.” Dad did not speak again and did not regain consciousness. Dad passed away around 3:30 am the next day. Leave it to Dad to get an early-advanced reservation, no doubt with a COMPLIMENTARY tee time. If you have ever waivered in your faith, lost your belief in God or doubted his existence or control over all things, then celebrate Dad’s, Ray Murphy’s, Grandpa’s, Uncle Ray’s, Cousin Ray’s, Corporal Murphy’s, or Bingo Poor Ray’s life, as he has confirmed that God exists and is in charge. My only regret is that I failed to ask how what does He look like, how tall He was, what did He sound like, does He look like His pictures and is He Irish? I will be better prepared next time, thanks to Dad.

A Mass of Christian burial will be held Monday, January 7, 2019 at 11:00 A.M. at Prince of Peace Catholic Church, 5100 W Plano Pkwy, Plano, Texas 75093 with Rev. Tom Cloherty presiding. A reception will be hosted following the mass in the Parish Hall.
Raymond will be laid to rest with his wife, Mary Ann Murphy at the Dallas Ft. Worth National Cemetery at 2:15 P.M.